Taking Risks
"If we listened to our intellect, we'd never have a love affair. We'd never have a friendship. We'd never go in business because we'd be cynical. Well, that's nonsense. You've got to jump off the cliff all the time and build your wings on the way down." -Ray Bradbury
Most of the things that we want in life or feel that are worth having involve taking some kind of risk to reach them. Are there goals and desires that you have not been able to achieve? Are there daring things that you want to do, but just can't summon the courage try them? You may have clear plans in your head about being successful in some particular area of your life, but just can't make yourself take the steps to achieve those goals.
You may not be one of those people who is a risk taker. The fear of failure may be holding you back from the life that you would like to live. Oftentimes, you may ask yourself, "Why didn't I try that?" "Why didn't I get out on the dance floor when someone asked me to dance?" Why didn't I speak up and tell the boss that I disagreed with his ideas?" "Why didn't I ask that person out, when I really wanted to?" People who are afraid to take risks spend a lot of time with regret. They often sadly think about "what might have been."
Some people are held back by a high level of anxiety. They worry about what they will look like if they fail. Others fear the stress in the environment - such as in car racing or riding a fast and dangerous roller coaster. A final contributor to not taking risks may be a sense of low self-esteem. Some people think they are not capable of completing risky tasks or they are the type of person who should not be doing such exciting things.
You may have had thoughts of going back to school to train for a new and exciting career. You may have wanted to take a risk and tell someone you love them, or even commit to a relationship and marriage. You may have wanted to go on a vacation by yourself, walk up to a complete stranger and start a conversation, or try to learn to be more assertive by listening to tapes you ordered from a television infomercial. All of these ideas involve trying to become accomplished at some task that you think you currently do not have mastered, or maybe have never even tried.
People who are risk takers are viewed as living exciting, fun-filled lives. They are the people we think about who sky dive or drive race cars. They seem to fearlessly go through life by throwing caution to the wind, and "grabbing the bull by the horns." They take charge of their lives and seem to make things happen without waiting for others to impact their lives. They also are better able to handle stress in their lives and are able to map out plans to deal with their problems.
You may look at those types of people and think, "How do they do it?" How do they get beyond their own fears to make themselves try new things and take a risk. They risk looking foolish. They risk being laughed at or being called a failure because they tried something that did not work out for them as they had planned. They weigh the risks of failing verses being successful, and usually determine that it is at least worth a try.
To determine your risk taking abilities, ask yourself whether you agree or disagree with the following statements:
At
times, I've sacrificed for an exciting opportunity.
Sticking
to my routine is not important to me. I don't mind a lot of change.
It's
important for me to try new things.
Free
time is a gift I really enjoy.
I
speak up for what I believe in.
These are the types of questions that are often asked to determine if someone is a risk taker. The more your agree with these statements, the more likely you are to take a risk.
Many people feel that when you are willing to take risks, life becomes more satisfying. You reach a sense of fulfillment because you feel as if you are tasting all that life has to offer. Even though you may be afraid, you persevere and try new things.
Risks may include everything from traveling overseas to getting married. They are also very individualized. What is considered risky to one person may seem very common place to another.
One way to begin taking risks is to make a list of those things that you would like to try, but have been putting off. You should come up with at least three different new things.
Next, you should come up with a list of things which would help you try these new ideas. That may include money, support from friends and family, a different location for work or where you live, or whatever it takes to help you try these new things.
Finally, you may need to work on your assertiveness skills. You may need to determine how often you are able to stand up for your rights, without infringing on those of others. Ask yourself, "When was the last time I spoke out against the mainstream ideas among my friends." If you can't remember, then it's been way too long.
You need to take a chance and say what is really on your mind. You can do this without offending others. You can do this without losing friends. There are many ways to frame a different opinion without making people angry at you.
The power of guided imagery can help you realize your dreams by imagining yourself taking that risk and visualizing what you will look like when you are successful. Many weight loss programs use this method when encouraging their clients to imagine what they will look like once they go to that exercise class, and can maintain the diet that will help them lose that extra weight.
Imagine yourself speaking in front of a group of people, and they applaud at the end of your speech! Imagine how relieved you will feel when that "risky business" is over, and how successful you will feel because you have made yourself overcome your fears.
Information
provided by Summit Medical Center Psychiatric Program
Hermitage, TN
November, 2000
